Forks = Future

Okay, I know this isn’t exactly the best topic I should be reviving my not-very long-dead -blog with, but it may be one of the biggest discoveries mankind may have stumbled upon. Or actually, I may have stumbled upon. Using a fork is truly one of the best ways to efficiently consume this deliciously tantalizing lactose dessert.

I know this made you hungry. Go get fat.

I know this made you hungry. Go get fat.

If you aren’t familiar with the pressure=thrust/area equation, you’re too young for this blog. Or rather, too lucky. Go watch TeleTubbies kiddo.

Just kidding! The point being, area is inversely proportional to pressure. Less area equals more pressure. But the reason why I am involving Physics in here is because many of us have lost brave metal, plastic or titanium spoons to ever adamant frozen hard ice cream which may be the only thing on this planet even diamond cannot cut through. My condolences with the families of those brave-now horribly-bent spoons.

Did you know there's an ice cream cafe called Bent Spoon? GOD how insensitive is that?!

Did you know there’s an ice cream cafe called Bent Spoon? GOD how insensitive is that?!

So if diamond can’t cut through cookies and cream, what possibly can?  of course it’s your fork you genius! Forks are the best way to eat ice cream and there’s so many reasons that I’d have to make one of my, now -almost- trademark lists again.
Which I’ve been told can be quite a monotonous read, so I shall stick to these disorderly paragraphs. Hmmph.

Alright, so forks. Now, as I mentioned before, since forks have pointy edges, they apply more pressure to the Ice cream and let you easily scrape through without having any disfigured cutlery around your kitchen. Now you may say that forks don’t collect as much ice cream as spoons do, and that is exactly what I’m coming to.

You see, we all are so concerned with healthy living, eating and exercising, yet when it comes to ice cream, the entire human race (and cats usually) have to succumb to the superiority of sweetened lactose. THE WORLD LOVES ICE CREAM but SADLY OH EVER SO SADLY it MAKES US FAT. And as you may have already tried and failed to do, eating ice cream in small portions is as hopeless as sitting and watching your country’s parliament in session.

Soooo, back to forks, you can easily eat ice cream in small amounts with them while still making sure that their anatomical dignity is maintained. And so is yours. (ha ha ha, I know)

Did I mention, they also add a nice texture to your beautiful ice cream? Go ahead, eat your Tiramisu with a fork today and take your glimpse… the future.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s